What if you had a better relationship with your audience?

Good morning,
It's another grey drizzly spring morning and I am writing you from my couch with my cat glaring at me because he wants to be on my lap. Have you ever noticed how hard it is to write on your computer with a cat on your lap? Yeah- well, he can wait.

And I am sipping tea from my new mug! Ben Eberly is the potter. I love his work.

I have been thinking a lot about the relationship we as artists have with the people who buy our work. 
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​​I had the greatest time yesterday (ok- now more than a week ago) going to the Asparagus Valley Pottery Tour- the one I mentioned in my last email.

It was fun to fondle all the pots, to see and feel how different everyone's work is, and to get to know a few people just a little better. I bought pots like a kid in a candy shop! And I was very happy to hand over my money because I love their work and I want to do my tiny part of supporting them.


In my 20's I used to do craft shows in NYC. It was a really big schelp- a ton of work to get the stuff together- a lot of making  what I imagined would sell, and then a few extraordinarily long days of setting up, smiling all day, and then tearing down. It was exciting and exhausting. And I remember how painful it was to watch most folks walk right past my booth.

It felt like rejection on a deep level. It felt a little like I was selling my soul, prostituting myself in the name of art. 

Now when I do craft shows- 30 years and a couple of careers later- it is again exhausting physically- but I come home invigorated.

My ego is not on the line and I am not prostituting my self. I have no trouble with most folks walking past my booth, because I get to have a few really great conversations with people who are excited about my work. I get to feel like the work is received; I am not mumbling to myself in a vacuum.  I end up feeling deeply nourished, re-energized, and inspired by the whole thing. 

It's connection with real people on a deep level about what I have created. What a gift!

The thing is that I had those deep conversations with a few good people then too. So what has changed? It's not just that I grew up- though that helps.

3 things off the top of my head that make it better:

1.  I now understand that if I am making work with integrity and honesty- following what is truly compelling to me individually, then the work will speak to a very specific set of people- and not others. And that is good. So I go to the show with the intent of having those conversations- connecting and enjoying being among my work and other artists work. It is an experience that I enjoy.

2. I don't  try to imagine what will sell and focus on making those things. I proved to myself way back in my 20's that the work that was best received was the work that I let myself play with, that I had let go of audience while I was making and just engaged the exploration.

3. I am not in a scarcity mind set. I do not have to sell. It's not that I am wealthy now, far from it. But my relationship to money has changed so I do not have the same kind of pressure, anxiety and fear-  on me to make it worth while financially. I trust more.

That third one is a big deal- it makes the difference between feeling like I am trapped and beholden to anyone who might give me money and feeling like I have agency and I can be generous.

If you are trying to make a living as an artist- you might be able to relate to this issue. In order to justify spending the time, effort and money on your creative work, you have to sell. You need the money. 

I want to poke a hole in that. A big hole. In fact I, want to violently destroy that concept that we have to sell to whoever will buy because we need the money. It is such a demoralizing, disempowering trap!

I have my story of selling to such a guy- bringing the work to his uptown apartment in a taxi at the end of a grueling day of at the craft show. It was my most expensive and significant piece and I had already lowered the price beyond where I was comfortable. He said he wanted to see if he liked it in his space. Once I was there he started to dicker with me about the price. I felt cornered and even though I tried to hold my ground I felt powerless. I was so shaken I was in tears leaving his apartment.

When he saw my emotional response, he told me to take it easy- it's just a game he said. A Game. It still makes me mad. It was my life, my heart work and I had put a lot on the line to be there. I felt like I needed his money. He had all the power and he was toying with me.  I still wish I had said no to him. He was not worthy of that piece. 

I heard a great story this weekend about a very famous ceramic artist who said no to such a person. She let a $75,000 sale go because the guy was behaving like an entitled disrespectful person. (I have stronger words coming to mind, but you get the idea.) It's fun to think of her saying no to that kind of money, but is it really the same thing if you have already reached that kind of success?

What if you had that kind of sovereignty even now? What if you only sold to people who were worthy of your work? I mean really, you are putting your heart and soul into it. You are not just whipping things off an assembly line conveyer belt. You are taking time with each and every part of the work. You care about it. It has meaning to you.

What if you valued your time, effort, skill, vision, creativity and soul enough to say no?

Do you really want it to go to some arrogant prick who is trying to get the best deal out of you, who collects work and brags about how little he paid for it and how desperate the artist was? Do you really want to grant him the power over you? 

Put that another way- would you want your child, or someone very dear to you, to give their power away like that because they need the money?



I know- but you do need the money. It is reality. Our economic system requires that you have money to survive. I get that. Hear me out.

Ok lets put it in a more positive way-

There are people out there who want your work and who value the fact that you put time and effort and money into making it. They want to support your continuing career as an artist. 

Read that line again. 

You are being generous with your work- making work that touches you on a profound level- putting your heart out there. That is very very generous. And there are people who value it and want you to make a good living doing this work.

Really. 

There are four pieces to this:
1. budgeting. If things feel tight or uncertain- take the time to get grounded financially. Get clear on your values and what you want to spend money on. Set some goals and work towards them. And only spend money that you actually have. It is a life changer if you can get clear and grounded about money. I made a video related to this idea here.


2. marketing- if you feel like marketing and sales is painful and horrible- then take the time to get clear on your values, strengths, temperament and mission and find a way to market and sell your work that feels in alignment with who you are. The thing is that if you are doing it right for who you are, it is fun! Crazy right? It is an extension of the gifts that you offer the world in your creative work. And when you have it right, meaning truly in alignment with who you are and not what the latest marketing guru says, you will be connecting with people who you like and value and who value you. The exchange of money and art will feel good because those people want you to keep making art- they value you and they want you to have a good life. And you will feel generous and whole- not tight and scared.

4. Community- get connected to other artists whose values are similar to yours- who you can share the journey with. Let yourself lean into a sense of belonging and the deeper values of what we are offering the world.

3. Take care of yourself! If you are burning it on all ends, you will necessarily feel like you are living in scarcity. Give yourself love, time off, play, good food, plenty of sleep etc- you know the stuff. 

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Ok- I  admit- it is no longer a grey drizzly spring morning. It is a week later and I am sitting again with my cup of tea and my cat who is dejectedly sitting on my ottoman next to my legs- how is it that he can look so dejected?

I hope you are getting out to see the emerging spring!
Warmly,
Val

PS- I will not be showing this spring at Paradise City. I hope you go anyway and have a great time connecting with fabulous artists. I am working on finishing a big commission piece- hoping to finally install it in early fall. I will show you pictures of it when it gets closer to being done. In fact, I hope to have an open studio event to show it off before I bring it down to VA to install it. Stay tuned.

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